Since the election, I hear a lot about "snowflakes" and adults acting like "children" for being upset about the election.  Here's a little something for you to consider as we continue to talk to our children about the election. 

My daughter has a half brother, who is absolutely adorable and handsome and smart. He is also a quarter Cuban. No big deal, right? Except, that she was afraid her brother would be deported. Her brother who was born here in the US to US citizens. Her brother who has a very respectable grandfather who came to this country and made a good and honest life for himself. She was afraid that Trump would send her brother away and build a wall. 

So, when I worry about how this election has affected our children, take heart, there is a reason, and it is very personal. Her name is Anika and she is 5 years old. She is a child and she cried. I explained to her that no one would ever be sending her brother away or kicking him out of the country. She doesn't understand what a country is. She doesn't understand that there are different religions. She doesn't understand that there are different races. She understands that she loves her brother dearly.

Yes, I understand that President-Elect Trump is not building a wall.  I understand that he is not deporting American citizens.  But, our children don't always understand.  It may takes days, weeks, or even months for them to come to us with their fears or concerns.  

Answer them truthfully, but keep in mind they are children.  And, the thing they first need to know is that you love them and that you will protect them no matter what they may see on the news, or in the schools.

I will continue to teach my children love and respect for ALL people, regardless of race or creed. And, when my children grow up, they will continue that legacy.

Anika, the Nail Polish(ed) Kitten

My darling daughter, Anika, was at it again.

Tonight, she decided to paint herself up as a kitty kat.  The little girl locked herself in my bedroom and painted herself using brown nailpolish.

"Oh no!".

 Removing nail polish from arms or legs would be one thing.  I could use some standard nail polish remover, but her face ... well, you don't want to use nail polish remover on a toddler's face, especially so closer to their eyes.

Once again, baby oil to the rescue.

Put some baby oil on a wash cloth or other soft cloth (not too smooth).  It takes a bit of rubbing, but it comes off fairly easily.

Of course, I had to create a little video of our little Anika and posted it on YouTube.  I couldn't help myself.  I'm sure other mom's have run into this, so I had to share.  (Removing Baby Oil From Skin)

She will always keep me on my toes :)

Child's Play

I recently read the article Apartment Complex Bans Kids From Playing Outside about an apartment complex in California.  As a parent, I find this shocking.  I would understand this for "Adult Only" complexes, and definitely with playing in hallways and stairwells.  But, outside?

I have seen this also close to where I live in Florida.  My parents live in an apartment complex that has a lot of 2 and 3 bedroom units.  Recently, my mom told me that the kids were no longer allowed to play in the large courtyards when they visited.  I was shocked, especially since I was getting ready to move and was seriously considering the same complex.

My parents' complex was perfect for a young family.  Small "villa" style apartments.  Each group of apartments surrounding a courtyard.  Throughout the complex there are several of these groupings.  It is a beautifully maintained complex.  This was a complex that really was designed for families, but has evidently decided that they don't want them anymore.  Or rather, they don't want the young kids that need to get outdoors and play.

As a mother, I want my children to go outside and play.  I encourage it.  We have bikes and scooters, and other small outside toys to encourage getting out and being active.  I even have a little put-put golf set for them to play with outside.  We always pick up our outside toys after playing and put them away.

I understand no playing in hallways or blocking sidewalks.  I definitely understand teaching your children to be polite and courteous.  But, keep it real.  Children need to play.  That is, of course, unless we want to raise a generation of overweight children who don't know how to enjoy life without electronics.

Good parenting doesn't mean a perfect, quiet, neat child. One of the many things that comes with good parenting though is teaching our children respect and when they can and can't just cut loose.  It is important that children have a place that they can just be a kid.  Kids need to know that they can just let go and be a kid.  A great place for that is at home.

Our Flawed Body Image

A couple weeks ago, Emma looked at me and said "Momma, you need to lose some weight."  It was a statement, completely out of the blue.  It also threw me completely off balance.

Emma is only 7 years old.  Even at such a young age, society has had an impact on what a person should look like.  Emma is not a heavy girl.  In fact, she is very tall and slender.  Statements like this worry me.   Does she worry about getting "fat"?  I hope not.  I am more worried about her being a healthy weight for her height.

I am not heavy.  Actually, I'm pretty happy with my size and weight.  I'm 5 1/2 feet tall and wear a size 6/7.  Not bad for a mom of four children.  I do have a mommy pouch.  It's not something I will go around showing off in a bikini, but it is there.

Children today, even young children, are being bombarded with "image" pressure.  Everyone should have a flat belly and be thin with perfect proportions.  Their skin tone should be even and smooth.  Everything should be perfect.  And, if it isn't?  Then, they need to change it.  That is what are little girls are learning.  We need to teach our children that there really are lots of different body types and that our bodies change over time.  I am not just talking about puberty but the changes that also occur as we get older.

Little girls know that one day they will grow up and develop.  Our society, however, has this idea that women should always retain that late teen, early 20's shape.  In reality, very few women retain much of a semblance to that shape throughout their lives.

I want my girls to be healthy.  I also want them to be happy with who they are and their individual body shapes.  They may grow up to be slender, or they may be a little more solid in build, but if they are happy and healthy, that is really what counts.

Permanent Marker ... Oh My!

It was one of those days when you just don't seem to be able to get motivated.  I spent most of my day sitting in front of the computer viewing job postings.  The house is a mess and there is a load of laundry to be done.  So what type of highlight can such a day have?  I have two words "Permanent Marker" ... okay, a thirtd "Ani".

Ani is my little toddler.  She loves to get into anything she can.  If you aren't watching closely, she will become a hurricane through the house.  Nothing seems to be safe.  Pretty standard toddler behavior.

We had gone to the pet store to pick up crickets.  Yes, crickets for the lizards.  When we got home I put away the crickets and then looked into the living room.  Something just wasn't right.  There was an odd shadow across Ani's face and she was covering something up.  No!  Not again.  I knew what had happened.  Ani had found the only permanent marker left in the house.  She had black cheeks, black arms and hands and black legs. 

Whatever shall I do?!  First, count to ten.  That didn't work, take a few more deep breathes and don't say a word.  Internet!  Yes, that is what I will do.  There must be some way to remove this without using nail polish remover or bleach on a toddler's face.  

Baby Oil!  ... baby oil?  No way!  That could not possibly work.  Still I had to try.  I found an old rag, grabbed the baby oil and rubbed softly on her black cheek.  It worked!  Yes, it worked! 

I am so thrilled that I was able to get most of it off her face and the rest of her body.  It doesn't work completely, but it does get most of it off.  Now, we have a greased up little darling who is about to get a shower.

We will never be without baby oil in the house.  I wondered when I had children, why does everyone give baby oil to new mothers.  I thought I would never use all the baby oil I was given.  I was wrong.  Sometimes it's good to be wrong.